All This Time
by WaspInterprizes
Summary: "All this time I thought that you were selfish, a bad man, a monster-someone who should be avoided at all costs." Little did she know that she had never been far from the truth.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist, and this story is not for profit.**

 **All This Time**

 _"_ _Pleasant day, isn't it?"_

 _Roy Mustang looked to his side. He hadn't heard the Crimson Alchemist approaching, but he wasn't exactly surprised to see him here. Wherever there was death or destruction, Major Kimbley seemed to follow. Or perhaps it was the other way around._

 _The Major's face was turned up to the clear sky above, a small smile on his face. A gentle breeze came through the valley that stirred the loose strands of his hair._

 _Roy Mustang frowned. The Major may have been looking towards the sky, but he knew he was referring to the scorched Ishvalans that lay scattered around the battlefield._

 _"_ _Not really." Roy responded through his teeth. It was unpleasant enough how often the state alchemists all had to see each other, and it was unpleasant mainly because of Kimbley himself. Something about the longhaired, sly-faced alchemist had always set Roy's teeth on edge._

 _…_ _.._

Riza Hawkeye jumped down off the train at the next station. All around her were men and women in uniform running about trying to figure out where they were going.

Riza hesitated for a moment, clutching her gun tightly. Even when she had signed the papers agreeing to join the military, none of it had really dawned on her. Not the war, nor the very realistic dangers in which she now found herself involved. Now, standing watching people with stern faces rushing back and forth calling out directions and orders, it finally sunk in.

"Do you need assistance, miss?" A soldier with a pencil and a clipboard asked her.

"No thank you sir; I'm just trying to find my squad leader." She answered.

"All newly arriving soldiers are being assigned now to state alchemists. May I ask what your name is?"

"Hawkeye. Riza Hawkeye. But, well, I'm sorry sir… I don't think I'm supposed to be assigned to a state alchemist. I'm here as a sniper, to work with that division."

"Oh, I see. Well in that case follow me." They started to make their way through the hustle of the moving crowd. The man she was following seemed to know his way around, but Riza struggled not to lose him in the chaos. "I see you brought your own rifle, miss." He said.

For the first time since the train ride from Amestris, Riza almost smiled. "Yes, it was my grandfather's."

"Well that's nice, but unfortunately the army will outfit you with one of their own guns. We don't want you using the wrong thing. You'll have to leave that with storage."

"Are you serious? You won't let me use my own gun? I know it works fine, I practiced with it before I arrived."

The man abruptly stopped walking and turned to her. His chest puffed out ever so slightly.

 _Fantastic._ Riza thought. _Someone hung up on his own insignificant amount of authority._

"I'm afraid that's exactly what I mean, Ms. Hawkeye. You're going to have to leave that gun with me, ma'am."

He reached for it, and there was a brief tug of war before a third voice interrupted them.

"Sergeant, I assume you must have already completed the task I gave you earlier for you to be bothering young women in your spare time."

"Um, no sir, Major Kimbley, I was just telling this woman that-"

"I heard what happened just fine. I don't think that it's a problem to let this sniper keep her gun when we are having trouble supplying everyone with guns on our own, do you?"

"No sir. I mean, you're absolutely right sir."

"Good. Then continue sorting out the rest of the troops."

"Yes sir."

They both watched the man leave before the alchemist turned back to Riza.

She was going to thank him for what he did, but when she looked in his eyes something held her back.

Something cold and hard-but not exactly serious-resided in those blue irises. Suddenly she didn't want to thank him. She didn't want to talk or look at this severe alchemist. She wanted to be back home in Amestris, where she had been safe and happy when her father was alive.

"I suppose you can thank me later." He said.

His words forced her to return to the present. "Thank you, sir."

He raised an eyebrow in reply, as if she confused him. Just as well. These days she confused herself.

"Snipers are to report to Colonel Jacobs for assignment. I don't have time to show you where he is."

"I understand, sir. And thank you, I think I can find him on my own." It wasn't completely true, but she would rather try and find him herself than spend a minute longer in this man's unsettling presence.

"Best of luck." He said with a smile in his voice. _Like there was something funny about matters of life and death._ But she was already walking away when he spoke, so she just acted as if she hadn't heard.

 _If all the alchemists are like this, I just don't know what._ She thought to herself. _But of course they all aren't. I've met one quite different before, in what seems now like another life._

 _"_ _What are you doing here, Kimbley?" Roy said, finally turning to look him in the eye. "Already finished murdering women and children?"_

 _"_ _I'm finished with my job, yes. I was wondering if my fellow state alchemist needed any assistance. I was going to lend it to you. It seems like you might; your shadow isn't here. With her following you all of the time, I wonder, how do you get on when she isn't around?"_

 _"_ _I do just fine." Roy said gruffly._

 _It was a lie, of course._

 _If it had been Hughes, or even Armstrong, Roy wouldn't have hesitated to voice his concern, and admit the unease he felt when he and Riza were sent on separate missions and were unable to work together. But for some reason he hated to hear Kimbley talk about Riza; like he was laughing at her, or maybe him, or maybe the both of them. It was time for him to change the subject. "Is the east warzone past the river cleared out yet?"_

 _Still smiling, the alchemist raised a hand over his eyes, shading them from the merciless Ishvalan sun. "I don't see anymore smoke coming from that direction. Call your men and we'll head out that way and see if there is any work still left to do."_

 _"_ _You call them." If Kimbley was going to tell Roy what to do, he might as well call his men too. "There's something I have to do first."_

 _…_ _.._

Riza's heart had almost stopped when she had seen the Ishvalan sneaking up behind Colonel Mustang. When she had shot him, it had been the first time since she joined the army that she hadn't regretted her kill.

Sitting now with Roy and Hughes over a cup of coffee, she still shivered to think how things might have gone if she had not been watching out for him. He no doubt thought it was purely coincidence that she had been watching the area he was in, but in truth since she had arrived she had been following him, making sure that he was safe.

It was the only time when her job didn't feel like some sort of terrible joke: when she killed someone who was about to hurt Roy. But the rest…the rest was horror: the killing of innocent people, most who were gentle civilians.

Fresh on her mind, she turned to ask Roy, "How could we all have fallen so low?"

Roy's eyes saddened, and he didn't look like he would be able to answer that question for her. Before he could attempt to try, someone not in their circle cut in.

"Because it's our _job."_

 _Not him again._

Unlike most of the Amestrian militants over the course of the war, he had changed very little since she had met him months ago before the battle had begun. Most people, like Roy, had perceptibly changed since the killing had begun. Mostly in the eyes, as Hughes would say. Major Kimbley seemed exactly the same. If anything, he looked _better_ since she had first seen him. Stronger and healthier somehow. Maybe it was because he had had the eyes of a killer to begin with.

He was going on about killing now, but Riza didn't hear what he was saying-she was too busy wondering if he remembered her at all, and she was hoping that he didn't. Or she was, until he pointed at her and asked her a question. Guess that was a _yes_. He remembered her after all.

"You don't enjoy your job do you, miss sniper? It's written all over your face." He asked Riza.

She bowed her head. "That's true. I don't enjoy killing." She answered. It was the truth. She hated taking lives; to her, it was a shameful thing.

He grinned at her. "Really?"

Riza frowned. What was the matter with him? He went on, not giving her the chance to answer.

"Can you honestly tell me, in the split second before you take down an enemy, that it doesn't give you some sense of satisfaction?"

The way he was looking at her. Like some ancient devil from myth, peering right into her heart and soul and exposing its darkest truths for everyone else to see. She wondered if her face matched the horror she was feeling inside right now.

She couldn't say it out loud. It wasn't possible. But she answered him with her eyes. _Yes, alright. Yes. I do._ He was still smiling. _How did he know?_

Of course Roy, gallant, testosterone-ridden soul that he was, tried to put an end to it. He grabbed the crimson alchemist by his shirt and yanked. "That's enough, Kimbley!"

Kimbley hardly seemed to notice. Instead of getting angry, he seemed annoyed. "I find you lot much harder to understand. Always trying to rationalize this…"

He went on. He said more horrible things, per usual. Riza tried not to listen but his words echoed through her ears and through her skull. " _Never take your eyes off the people you kill. Never forget them because I promise that they won't forget you."_

Only after that did he pull away from Mustang's grasp and announce that he had work still to do.

His words hung in the air over everyone's head like a guillotine. It made it too easy to imagine what would be coming next.

 _Kimbley raised his eyebrows but didn't question Roy as he left the Crimson Alchemist and made his way shuffling through the prone bodies. Somewhere in the back of his mind he heard his men and the other soldiers being called together by Kimbley and checking themselves for injuries and weapons._

 _He walked further away, and slowly the voices became quieter and quieter until they faded altogether. He walked on, not finding what he was looking for, until he came to a shady spot next to a low stone house._

 _A little girl was lying there, probably dead no more than a day. Her death had been particularly gruesome, instead of directly taking a bullet she had been stabbed in the stomach with the bayonet from a soldier's gun. Her stomach was stained red with all the blood, which had pooled over into the ground beside her. Roy's eyes were foggy as he knelt down next to her and picked the brilliant red flower which was growing in the ground beside her stomach._

 _When he returned to Kimbley and his men they were all in formation, ready to move forward. Roy nodded, and Kimbley called the men to march ahead while they both stood and watched._

 _"_ _Dreadful form. If I was the Fuhrer, I would command stricter discipline and training for these foot soldiers." Kimbley said, scowling at the men as they spoke to each other, laughing and sharing stories._

 _"_ _If you were the Fuhrer, their training would be the least of their worries. "_

 _Kimbley didn't say anything, but his smile grew just a bit broader. Well, one can say can say this for him, Mustang thought, he never defends himself from accusations that he knows to be true._

 _Kimbley's eyes fell down to the red flower Mustang held by the stem in his hand. Roy didn't even turn red, he was used to it by now. He quickly inserted the flower into the lapel of his pocket, but the Crimson Alchemist just smirked and walked away._

 _The march east was even more unpleasant than Roy had expected it would be. It was hard for Roy to pay attention to his surroundings and keep a sharp eye out while Kimbley was beside him. The man was just too eager; every moment it seemed like he was ready for an attack, like he couldn't wait to use his destructive alchemy on any Ishvalans with the bravery to confront them._

Please ** _,_** _Roy found himself praying,_ Please let them not attack. For once, spare their lives, spare me from having to watch the Crimson Alchemist take them, and spare me of having to help him do it.

 _The sun was sinking down low on the horizon of a brilliant red sky. Roy wished Riza could see it. He didn't entirely understand her fascination with beauty, but he loved that she always found a way to appreciate the things that he couldn't; that she could always see things in a different light._

 _"_ _Do you mind if I asked you something, Mustang?" Kimbley said, interrupting his thoughts._

 _"_ _Yes."_

 _Kimbley laughed- a scratchy, breathy sound. "All right then, I won't."_

 _Just then a sentry ran up to Roy. "Sir, we've arrived at the village. It's completely deserted. Still smoking from an earlier battle and no sign of any Ishvalan stragglers."_

 _"_ _That's good to hear." Roy said at the exact same moment Kimbley said, "Too bad."_

 _Roy ignored the comment. "We had better turn back. This area could still be dangerous and we don't have enough reinforcements if we run into any trouble."_

 _"_ _I disagree, Mustang. It's getting dark and we are too far away from base to make it back tonight. We can stay in the city this evening and head back in the morning. And besides, I'm all the reinforcement we need."_

 _"_ _My God you're something else." Roy tried to put as much venom in his words as possible, hating more than anything the Crimson Alchemist's unshakeable will._


	2. Chapter 2

It was getting late at camp a few nights later and Riza was still up. Although it was nearly midnight most people were still up: drinking, playing cards, laughing and having a good time in general. Thanks to many of the state alchemists, but mostly to Major Kimbley, the tide of the war had turned. Amestris was now on the offensive and had inflicted some heavy damage to the Ishvalans. People were still talking about Kimbley's victory on the battlefield, who was off in the corner sharing a celebratory bottle of wine with Major McDougal, one of the only other state alchemists he seemed to be able to get along with.

Everyone was celebrating, in fact, except for Riza. It was late and Colonel Mustang should have been here by now.

On his way out of the room, Major Armstrong stopped and patted Riza on the shoulder so hard it almost knocked her over. "Don't worry, Miss Hawkeye, I'm sure that he will be back soon. It's probably just the storm that's keeping them out."

"I hope you're right, Major Armstrong."

Looking past her shoulder, Armstrong suddenly smiled. "Well, speak of the devil!"

Riza turned around quickly, and could have nearly jumped for joy, seeing Roy there, soaking wet but completely unharmed.

"Colonel! I was worried something had happened…"

His smile was a weary thing, heavy from exhaustion that was trying to pull the corners down. "You shouldn't have worried. I just lost my flashlight and I wasn't able to light a new torch in the rain."

"Here Colonel let me take your coat."

He thanked her and she heard him chatting with Armstrong before the big man said he was off to bed.

When the two of them were finally alone, Roy stepped closer to Riza and pulled something out of his jacket pocket to give to her.

Riza smiled, knowing before she looked down what it was. "You shouldn't have Roy."

"It's nothing." He handed the red flower to her, which she took gently, holding the petals delicately with her fingers. _Weeks before, they had all been sitting around after a battle. The smoke was still rising from the burnt buildings and the smell of sweat and blood was still in the air. Riza walked over to a pile of bodies, where red flowers were just starting to poke above the ground. She reached down and plucked one up, staring at it for a moment before putting it into her pocket. "What is that?" Roy had asked, when she made her way back to where he stood with the other alchemists. "A flower. It only grows in Ishval. There is so little water here in the desert, these flowers are known to sprout up out of the dirt just minutes after water is poured on the ground."_

 _"_ _I guess blood is mostly water, huh?" Roy said, a note of sorrow making its way into his voice._

 _Riza didn't reply. For a few moments they said nothing. "How did you know, about the flowers?" Roy finally asked._

 _"_ _Father. He loved to study; plants were no exception." Roy couldn't help but smile at the note of pride in her voice. Her father had been a man Roy had greatly admired._

 _"_ _Come on, Riza, we have to get back."_

 _"_ _Yes, you're right." But she hadn't dropped the flower, she tucked it into her pocket. "You're going to take that with you?" He asked._

 _"_ _Yes. I like to remember that there's beauty even in death, hope even in sorrow."_

 _Roy nodded._ Ever since that day, he had brought her the flowers any time he found them.

"Is something wrong? You don't seem happy."

"It's just that every time you give me one of these, I'm reminded that you were in danger."

"Well you shouldn't. Worry, I mean. All of us are in danger. From the Ishvalans or from ourselves."

Riza nodded."Yes, sir."

 _If any of the soldiers thought it was strange that the two alchemists avoided one another so carefully, they didn't say anything, at least not around the two state alchemists. When the thought crossed Roy's mind, he guessed that his men probably knew him well enough now to know that Major Kimbley wasn't his favorite person._

 _Many of them knew the man's reputation by now. They had heard the stories about his no-qualms love of violence and destruction, and a few had even had friends under Kimbley's command and who had told about how strict and unyielding he was. So none of them argued when Kimbley said he was taking a few of them and he wanted to look around the city some more and search for any surviving Ishvalans._

 _Meanwhile, Roy and the rest of his men tried to set up a safe camp in the abandoned town hall; the only building big enough in the village for all of them to stay in._

 _Hours later it was dark, but most of the men were unable to sleep, afraid to in this recent warzone._

 _"_ _Ghosts." Said a young soldier over the fire they had built in the central room from abandoned furniture._

 _Roy turned to the boy. "What was that, soldier?" Superstitious fears were one of the few things not tolerated in Colonel Mustang's troops._

 _To Roy's surprise more than anyone else's, the boy didn't back down. He met his gaze evenly over the flickering flames that Roy had lit for them all._

 _"_ _Ghosts, sir. It's bad luck for us to be staying here, so soon after the battle. There's an old Ishvalan tale, "Make your camp in your enemies blood/ Not yet freshly dried/ Become a ghost yourself you will/amongst those here that have died."_

 _"_ _That's nice poem, soldier, but you know as well as I do that Ishvalan myths don't affect men from Amestris." He tried to make his voice a bit lighter, but Roy was afraid the boy saw his involuntary shudder._

 _At that moment the ground shook so hard anyone who was standing up fell to the ground. Cups shattered and torches fell off the walls, casting shaky shadows on the horrified faces of Roy and his men._

 _"_ _What was that?" Roy thought to himself_

 _"_ _Sir!" The guards at the doorways had let in a breathless soldier-one of the men that had gone to patrol the grounds with Kimbley._

 _"_ _What is it soldier?!" Roy demanded, trying to keep his balance on the still shaky ground._

 _"_ _It's the Ishvalans sir! Scores of them, come to attack the city! They ambushed us but luckily Kimbley was able to hold them off for a bit with an explosion. He sent me ahead to tell you and the others. They are coming as fast as they can to fall back to this location. We need to get ready for battle."_

 _Roy nodded his head. "You men heard him! Get ready to fight; we are under attack. After Kimbley and the others come in get ready to secure those doors. Grab all of your weapons, I want every able bodied men at every window and opening in this building!"_

 _…_ _._

 _It'll never wash off_. Riza thought. _Never._

Outside of the main camp building she tried as hard as she could to scrub the red off of her shoes with the water from the spout. In the early morning light the blood looked black on her boots.

 _It'll never, ever wash off_ she couldn't stop thinking.

The spout was rusty and creaky as she tried to quickly shut it off once her shoes were as clean as they could possibly be. Water was scarce in Ishval. The people they were fighting this war against would probably never use water for something as trivial as scrubbing off their boots.

 _I'll try to remember that,_ she thought to herself _and conserve this water_. _Starting right now I won't take anything else for granted_. She nodded to herself and turned off the waterspout.

A split second later, someone's hand reached past her, turning the water not just back on but to full blast.

She stepped aside and tried to hide the look of disgust on her face as Major Kimbley stuck his shoes underneath and let the water pour over them, washing away the dirt and blood off of the shiny black surface.

He looked down from his shoes and up to her face, smiling at her. "Morning, Miss Sharpshooter."

"Good morning, Major."

He pointed down to her still-dirty shoes. "It doesn't look like you've finished cleaning your boots off yet. Do you still need this?" He said, gesturing to the water that he had left spouting onto the ground.

"No." She said, reaching down to turn it off quickly.

He raised an eyebrow at her, which she tried to ignore, but he caught her elbow as she started to walk away.

"You can't go in there with that dirt all over your shoes. The officers will be angry."

"I don't care. I don't want to waste water for something as stupid as that. Since the war and the drought people have been going thirsty all over this country. I won't do it anymore."

The sound of his tongue clicking broke the silence, and when she looked up he was shaking his head back and forth in what seemed like pity. "Not _people,_ miss Hawkeye. Enemies. Our enemies. Yours and mine and everyone else's here."

"They aren't my enemies, major. They are just people, some of them innocent, who I've been told to kill. Nothing more."

He shrugged. "Same thing."

She turned away from him. "You're sick."

"Why? Because I see things for what they are? Because I don't try to act self-righteous like the others? Like Mustang?"

At the mention of Roy, Riza glared at Kimbley, her hand twitching towards her gun.

Kimbley didn't miss the gesture.

"Oh, that's right. No one says anything unpleasant about Mustang in your presence. Wherever he is, you're always somewhere close behind. Wherever he is you follow. Always there to watch him and protect him with those sharp eyes and quick trigger fingers. What a waste."

"I'm just doing my job, major."

"Of course you are. He doesn't deserve it, you know."

This time she met him square in the eye. "If anyone does, it's him." She said evenly but firmly, and he was the first one to look away. "Just forget about, I'll go in and speak to the officers another day." She turned away from the building and started making her way back to the field.

Kimbley stood and watcher her go. "Suit yourself. But, Miss Hawkeye?"

She stopped, but didn't turn as she waited for him to speak.

"Everyone is the enemy."

…

Riza stood next to Hughes the next morning as she and the other troops waited in line for their officer to come out. Roy had been called into some meeting early this morning and still hadn't emerged. Riza wanted to know where the fighting was going to be, so that she could go out ahead before the others and pick off any Ishvalan stragglers who might be lying in ambush for them.

When Roy did come back he smiled at his men who greeted him eagerly, but Riza knew Roy well enough to know when something was bothering him.

Roy strolled over to Hughes and Riza when he had given his men their orders. Hughes slapped him on the back and exchanged a few words before going off to his own regiment. When they were finally alone, Riza turned to Roy.

"Is something the matter, Colonel?"

A grim smile spread slowly across his face. "How did you know, Lieutenant?"

Riza didn't answer, instead waiting for him to speak.

"You won't be working for my regiment any more. I'm sorry. Another officer has requested that you would be needed more for his missions."

A million questions popped into Riza's head, but she could only manage to croak one out. "What officer?!"

Roy turned and pointed across the square, to where Major Kimbley was standing, hands in his pockets, with the rest of his own men. He smiled at her when she met his eyes. Quickly she turned her head back to Roy.

"He can't just have me reassigned like that."

"He got one of the uppers to do it. He must have some important jobs planned, because lately they've been doing pretty much whatever he wants."

"I see." Riza said quietly.

"It'll be OK, Ltd. We'll still see each other all the time. We'll just be working apart now."

"Of course, Colonel. I'm fine, really." Riza said, but she sounded anything other fine. She glanced back across the square, where Kimbley was standing. Slowly, he took one hand out of his pocket, and motioned her over.

"Looks like I have to go." She said.

"I'll see you around, then." He said, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Of course."

She could feel both Roy and Kimbley's eyes on her as she made her way to her new superior officer. As she stood in front of him, she unslung her gun from her shoulder.

"Orders, sir."

"No small talk or thanks at all?"

"I'm not going to thank you for making me transfer to another regiment for completely unnecessary reasons." She said, then, remembering that she was now talking to her superior officer, added a grudging, "Sir."

"Suit yourself then." He motioned for the rest of his men to start moving, and then made his way in step to the side of them. Riza, not knowing what else to do, fell in step beside him.

"You're wrong, though. My reasons aren't unnecessary. I, or should I say _we,_ have important work to do, and I need the best sniper we have much more than Colonel Mustang does."

"So where are we going?"

All the time he had been walking his eyes had been moving over his troops and into the distance ahead of them, but now they slid down to where Riza walked beside him.

"To battle."


	3. Chapter 3

As far as Riza could tell, she seemed to be doing the same thing for major Kimbley that she had done for Roy.

Riza scouted ahead, finding a place here or there to stand watch. Through the spyglass on her rifle she would watch for any movement, and take out any Ishvalans who were in their way on their path ahead.

Kimbley and the rest of the men would stand behind, waiting for her signal, and when they got it they would make their way ahead. When the real fighting began, Riza would find a carefully hidden spot on some sort of high ground and watch major Kimbley, just like she watched Roy, and make sure that he was safe, killing anyone who tried to hurt him.

She found herself missing Roy as he stood crouched down for hours on end sometimes, watching the battle and major Kimbley, but she couldn't deny even to herself that there was something very appealing about the way that major Kimbley did his job. Well, perhaps appealing was the wrong word. _Interesting_ was more like it. He used his alchemy with a certain grace and enthusiasm that Mustang, for all his skill, lacked.

It wasn't really surprising when Riza thought about it. From what Kimbley had said earlier about his complete lack of disturbance as far as killing was concerned, he was probably holding back.

Riza was used to waiting until the end of the day to call it quits and make her way back to camp to eat and rest, although the rest of Roy's men had been able to take a few breaks for lunch and water throughout the day. Major Kimbley made it very clear that none of his men took breaks until the fighting was over, usually after the sun had already gone down.

As they all sat around a fire, Riza watched their tired and weary faces, too exhausted and focused on their food to talk or joke as they had done in Roy's camp.

As soon as they were finished eating most of them went straight to bed, and there were only a few other soldiers left sitting around the fire when major Kimbley came and sat down beside Riza.

"Good work today, soldier. I'm glad to know that I have someone competent watching my back." He raised his coffee cup in toast to her before taking a sip.

Riza almost repeated that she was just doing her job, but instead she found herself saying "Thanks." She and Roy were such good friends, and the rest of the men were so used to her by now, that everyone just seemed to take it for granted that she had the ability to protect them all. They didn't ever think anymore about the enormous amount of stress she was under to make sure that they were all safe. It was actually pleasant being thanked for once. But the happy feeling faded just as quickly as it had come when she realized that Roy was now on his own without her.

As if he had read her mind, Kimbley raised an eyebrow and said, "I wouldn't worry too much about Mustang. He's too lucky to be killed."

She nodded, unconvinced.

"You don't believe me?"

"I wish I could."

"You should. I rarely lie." When she didn't say anything, he added, "It isn't like I would just try and make you feel better, after all."

"Good point." Riza said. He was probably right. It would take nothing short of a miracle to bring Roy down.

"So what's the draw? I don't completely understand it." Kimbley said.

"What are you talking about?"

"Colonel Mustang. I don't understand it."

She thought about how in the world she was supposed to answer that question, but luckily she didn't have to.

A soldier came by handing out mail to everyone who was still up, interrupting her. He called out names, and Riza wasn't surprised that he didn't call hers out. There was no one left in her life to write her a letter.

She wasn't surprised to see that Kimbley got something, a fancy white envelope with several pages inside. He was in charge of all of these men after all, he surely had all sorts of correspondences all the time from the higher ups. She was surprised to see the corner of his mouth twitch a bit in laughter as he read the pages.

Riza couldn't resist; "What is it?" She asked, inclining her head just a tiny bit to look at the pages in his hands. The writing was tiny but neat, and sort of swirly. If Riza didn't know better, she would say it was a girl's handwriting.

"It's my sister." Kimbley said, still reading.

"You're sister?" Riza couldn't control the shock in her voice.

Kimbley looked up. "Why are you so surprised?"

"I don't know…I guess you just looked like one of those people who don't have any family at all."

"Like you?"

She glared at him but he seemed not to notice. "Of course I have a family. I may not be very close to most of them, but I've always got along very well with my sisters."

"Sisters? You mean there's more than one?"

He nodded. "I have three. The oldest is sixteen, the one who wrote, and the others, the twins, are both six."

"So many years between all of you. I mean, you're a little old."

He smiled. "I suppose."

"So…what is she like? Your sister? I mean…is she like you?" An image of a dark haired girl with a crazy smile on her face and fire in the background flashed in her mind.

"Not really. She doesn't know alchemy, or have an interest in it. But she is very refined and cultured like I am. It's part of our upbringing. Her interests are horseback riding and playing the piano."

"You're kidding."

"I'm not. She is also very clever, like I am. I enjoy having many stimulating conversations with her that I simply would not be able to have with others."

"So you're saying she shares your insane ideas about morality and death?"

"She is open minded and sees things for what they are, like I do."

So she was crazy. "Well that's nice, I suppose, that you have someone to speak to."

He set his letter down and took up his coffee cup again. "Don't sound so sad, miss Sharpshooter. I'm sure that after this war is over you'll have all the time in the world to find a new family."

Riza stood up. "It's time I got some sleep."

"I'll see you in the morning." He said.

She nodded and went off.

 _Kimbley and the rest of the men made it inside just before Roy ordered the doors to be closed._

 _Roy ran up to Kimbley, who was looking slightly breathless but somehow just as jovial as ever. "What happened?" Roy demanded._

 _"_ _Ishvalans ambushed us. Didn't that soldier explain this to you already? It's not as if I have anything else to add Colonel Mustang…"_

 _"_ _Alright, alright. How many are there, I mean? What should we do?"_

 _There were shouts now from outside and the Amestrisians inside hustled to stand to attention. Roy hated the worried looks on their faces, but he knew he probably looked the exact same way._

 _Kimbley didn't take even a second to respond. "What do we do? What do you think we do? We do our jobs as alchemists."_

 _"_ _There's too many soldiers in here for us to use our alchemy. We could hurt someone."_

 _"_ _We go up to the roof. I, at least, can take them all out up there." Kimbley made for the stair well. "You can follow me and come do your job, or you can stay here with the rest of these children." He said over his shoulder._

 _Roy followed, more hesitantly than he should have considered they were amidst a battle. But there was just something about following Kimbley alone up the roof that unsettled Roy._

 _…_

 _Kimbley was already leaning over the edge of the Roof by the time Roy got up there._

 _And he was laughing_

 _"_ _What the hell are you laughing about?"_

 _Kimbley finally stopped, but Roy wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer. He got it anyway._

 _"_ _Life, Colonel Mustang, just life. Sometimes it's just so good to be alive, and I can scarcely believe my luck."_

Why. _Roy thought. "Listen we need to hurry this thing up, people are getting hurt and our men are counting on us."_

 _"_ _They certainly are. Come stand over here, Mustang. They're all waiting below for their reckoning."_

 _Roy walked up beside Kimbley. Sure enough, the Ishvalans were all waiting below, although not as many as Roy had originally thought there would be._ This was all Kimbley's fault. He had insisted on staying here in the city even though they all knew it was dangerous.

 _"_ _Colonel Mustang."_

 _"_ _Yes?" Roy didn't turn around._

 _The next moment there was a sharp tug he felt in his stomach. He glance down and saw the end of a blade sticking out through him. Quickly Roy flashed around to face Kimbley, but despite his quickness he was still in shock from the wound and when he raised his hand to summon his alchemy Kimbley hacked it off with the end of a bayonet._

 _…_ _.._

They made their way over a land of sand and sun, slowly but surely. Their regiment was farther away from the others so Riza didn't hear or see Roy for weeks. The Crimson Alchemist and his men were farther out now than any of the troops had made it yet. Everyday Riza and the rest of them woke up early and made their way through Ishval, leaving destruction in their wake. She went ahead or followed behind to make sure that major Kimbley was protected, but when they were just setting up camp or waiting for orders, Kimbley always requested that Riza stand close to him.

She knew he didn't trust her, but it was impossible to deny that he didn't enjoy her company. She was the only soldier that he spoke to besides to just give orders.

He never spoke about anything personal, usually just technical things, but she still noticed the way he singled her out. And it wasn't that he had a hard time talking other people, it just seemed like he had no desire to.

They were making their way around a mountain pass now; Riza had already gone ahead and made sure the way was safe. She walked beside Kimbley now, both of their eyes open for any enemies up ahead, but they spoke now about leadership.

"A strong leader shows no mercy. He doesn't let up and he pushes everyone to their limit. Otherwise how would they know their full potential?" He said.

"They would reach their full potential by their respect and love for their leader. That's how. If a leader is kind and caring for his followers, then they would want to do anything for him. That's how they would truly reach their limit, not by putting them under immense stress or hardship."

"I disagree. Look at yourself, for instance. You are working just as hard for me as you ever did for Mustang, and the two of us are as different as two leaders can be."

"That's different not because of the two of you. That's different because of who I am. I'm not like the rest of the soldiers, I'm a sniper and I go on my own way."

There was a grin in Kimbley's voice as he spoke. "Maybe that's true, miss Sharpshooter. But it still doesn't mean that Mustang is a better leader than I am."

"I didn't say that he was a better leader."

"But the leader that you described is Colonel Mustang. So you must be saying that he is."

"I…no. That's not what I'm saying. I'm just saying that…I've seen the way Mustang treats his troops, and I see the way they act. The loyalty in their eyes. They would die for him. I don't think that your men would die for you."

"Would you?" He asked.

"What?"

"Die for him?"

"I…don't know."

"Don't you?"

"Yes. Yes, I would. I would die for Colonel Mustang." Ahead of her was the body of a young Ishvalan soldier that she had shot earlier when she was checking the way ahead. Growing beside him was one of the blood flowers. She thought of Roy. Going towards it, she bent down to take a closer look.

"And what about me? Would you die for me?"

She took a deep breath. Would she? She reached down to pick the flower, taking a moment to get her thoughts together.

Before she could anything, she heard a quick intake of air and then felt her back grind into the rocks on the ground as Kimbley tackled her.

She grinded her teeth together against the pain of Kimbley's weight on top of her and a searing sting in her right arm. As he pulled himself off of her she heard him shouting at the men to get into formation.

Riza wasn't sure what was going on until she heard more shots coming from behind them.

They were being ambushed.

"Kimbley, what's happening? Are we being attacked?"

He looked down at her, then back towards where the shouts were coming from. "Yes. We were so careful checking the way ahead we didn't think that someone might be stalking us from behind."

"You're hurt, sir." She said, looking at his jacket, which was soaked with blood. He looked down and unbuttoned it until he only had a white undershirt on.

"No, I'm not. You are. This is your blood."

She looked down and saw that he was right. He had pushed her forward, but she had still been shot. Her arm was completely red and she wasn't sure if she could even lift it.

Men were running past them and from the shouts and explosions she was sure that the fighting had already started.

"Please help me up, sir. I have to help."

He narrowed his eyes as he leaned down over her and touched her arm. She hissed from the pain when his fingers prodded her wound.

"You can't fight. You can't even get up, much less use your arm. I'm going to take you to the meds before the battle here gets too ugly. You're going to have to sit this one out, miss Sharpshooter."

"No! I can fight! One of my arms still works-Ahhh!" As he lifted her off the ground the pain from her wounded arm cut off her thoughts. She forgot for a moment about fighting and instead prayed that they wouldn't have to cut her arm off.

As he took her back towards the meds she saw soldiers running the other way towards the fight, which didn't seem to be going very well. There were screams and explosions coming from behind as the enemy pushed forward.

Weakly, she opened her eyes at Kimbley above her. "The fight…we have to go back!"

"Don't worry. I'll go back and end this as soon as I get you back."

He did exactly that. After leaving her with the doctors he left. Mere minutes later explosions rocked the ground. The last thing Riza saw before she passed out was the glasses and vials on the small table beside the bed they laid her on fall off and smash to the ground.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I want to thank InconsciousSin and mixmax300 for their reviews as well as the other people who favorited and followed this story! I appreciate your support and** **maybe there will be more Kimbley stories in the future:)**

Riza was sure she was dreaming when she saw Roy Mustang's face floating above hers; a halo of light around his face making him look like an angel.

"Roy?" She said doubtfully.

The side of his mouth twitched in happiness. "You could say it a little more cheerfully, you know."

She smiled even though it hurt a little. "What are you doing here, Roy?" Attempting to make some sort of motion, she tried to sit up but her arm felt like a dead weight. She groaned and leaned back in bed.

"What does it look like? Visiting my wounded sniper. You gave us all quite a scare."

It all came back to her now. Getting shot, the ambush, Kimbley saving her and then ending the battle…

"What did they do to me? Will I be OK?"

"Relax, Hawkeye. They're expecting you to make a full recovery. The doctors took the bullet out, but they gave you some pretty strong medicine to numb your arm. It might take a few days for it to wear off. They also gave you some stitches from the damage the rocks did when you hit them."

"Anything else?"

"Oh yeah, and you had a concussion."

"Great."

"Yep. It might be a while before you can go back out."

"Unbelievable!" She said a little too loudly. Her voice rang against the empty room.

He reached over and put a hand gently on her good arm. "Don't be so upset. You got off lucky."

"Thanks to major Kimbley." Riza said.

Roy frowned.

"It's true though, isn't it? He saved me. I would be dead right now if it weren't for him."

"But at the cost of several others."

"What are you talking about?"

"He took all that time to carry you back, and all the while his men, your companions, were being slaughtered. Before he ended the battle with his alchemy he let hundreds of his men be killed while he got you to safety."

She knew he told the truth. She remembered now, Kimbley taking her back the other way, while all the while men were dying. But even so…."Why are you telling me this? I don't need to be reminded."

"Apparently you do. And I just don't want you to think he was a good person or anything. He's still a monster, remember."

"Of course." Roy was right. It was horrible that he had sacrificed all of those other men just to save her, but she would be lying to herself if she said a small part of her wasn't relieved. She was alive, after all. It was hard to be angry at him, even when he had done something horrible, knowing that he had saved her. "What does it mean, sir, that he would save me? What's going on?"

"It's simple. He respects you. He knows you're extremely skilled, obviously. He thought that you were worth more than all of his other men. Hell, he was right. Doesn't make it OK, though."

"No. No it doesn't. I suppose I should still thank him, though. Where is he?"

"You won't be able to for a while at least. He's back out in the field."

"Already? They left without me?"

"You might be in here for a while. They couldn't wait for you. We all have some busy days ahead of us."

"Us? Don't tell me you're leaving, too?"

He turned his head, eyes squinting as he stared out of the window where the noon sun was coming in bright. "I'm afraid so. I'm heading out this afternoon. I'm sorry."

She wanted to protest, to beg him not to go, but how could she? She couldn't even ask him to stay with her, and she couldn't even tell him about the way she felt about him-the way she had felt for years. But she had to. Right now. She was a strong woman and a warrior at that. Her heart was steel and she was not afraid to bare it to anyone, and especially not the man that she loved from her head to her toes.

"Roy."

He had made his way to the door, but he stopped and turned now, waiting for her to speak.

"I just wanted to say…"

He waited for her to go on. He was smiling, one hand on the door, and a sparkle in his dark eyes.

But she couldn't. It wasn't the right time.

"Be careful."

He laughed. "I have to be since my trusty sharpshooter won't be watching my back. But you should know better than to worry about me. I'll be OK. I promise."

She nodded to him and then turned so she wouldn't have to watch him leave.

He would come back. He wouldn't leave her here alone.

…..

 _Roy gasped, falling to the ground and clutching his bloody stump. His vision started to go grey, although he wasn't sure why. Although he couldn't see anymore, he could still here Kimbley's laugh coming from above, and then his voice._

 _"_ _I must say Roy, you look oddly surprised. It's strange to me. After all, you never trusted me before, and you never really liked me. Are you really so surprised right now?"_

 _Roy struggled for a moment to speak. It felt was like trying to breathe underwater. Pain racked his whole body and made his vision cloudy. "Yes." He finally spurted out. "I knew you were insane, but I thought you were loyal to Amestris."_

 _"_ _That's rich, Roy. You should know something about me by now; I'm loyal to no one but myself. "_

 _"_ _Why." Roy said, lacking the energy to add inflection to his voice._

 _"_ _Well, I would like to tell you it's nothing personal, but then that would be a lie. To tell you the truth Mustang, I'm after something and you're standing in my way."_

 _Roy gurgled a little, a sound they both knew was a question._

 _"_ _You don't know? Haven't I said often how much I love passionate women?"_

 _It couldn't be. Not her. Not his sniper._

 _But of course it was._

 _Coughing and spitting a good amount of blood before he could speak, Roy managed to sit up a little. "She hates the job." He croaked._

 _"_ _Yes, she's not passionate about her job, that's true. She's passionate about something else."_

 _Any other moment Roy would have denied it as he had always done, to himself and to others. But time was too short for that now. Of course he knew that Riza loved him. Almost as much as he loved her. So much that he could never tell her…never bear to lose her if he said so and the military separated them._

 _Kimbley brushed some dust off of his jacket and shrugged."I wish someone were that passionate about me. Maybe she might be. It's all about a transfer of loyalty." After he spoke he smiled, and bent down to where Roy was laying._

 _To his horror, Roy felt Kimbley opening up his lapel, and taking out his pocket watch, and then the blood red flower that he had picked yesterday._

 _"_ _Nice seeing you, Roy."_

 _Roy felt himself being lifted up by his shirt, and swiftly falling through the air. The building wasn't particularly tall, but Roy knew if the ground didn't do him in, then the Ishvalans waiting below surely would._

 _Roy wasn't one to waste his last moments in regret; regret for the mother he would never see again, Hughes' wedding that he would never attend, or the words he wanted to say to a beautiful blond sniper that he would never be able to now. Instead he just settled in and hoped that she would like the flower that he picked for her._

 _…_

Riza could stand up now. She knew she could have stood up days ago, but the doctors had been very strict. She was still not to stand up unless someone was there to catch her if she fell, but a few weeks ago, towards the early hours of the morning, something had woken her in her sleep. A bad dream, she had thought, because the horrible feeling it had left her wouldn't go away, and she had paced back and forth across her room until the doctors came in and told her to get back in bed.

That was days ago. It was the middle of the night now and she couldn't sleep, so she stared out the window.

In the distance, lights started to appear. She pushed herself off the sill and stood up a little straighter. It was soldiers returning. She could hear voices now.

It had to be Roy. He was supposed to have been back two days ago.

Should she put on her shoes and go meet him? No-the doctors would just stop her in the hall. She would wait for him here.

She leaned back against the window, her face against the warm glass, almost falling asleep until the sound of the door opening jerked her awake.

She turned quickly, her heart beating in anticipation, but it wasn't Roy.

Major Kimbley was standing there in the doorway, for once not looking smug.

"Kimbley. It's you. I…I thought you were Roy."

He didn't say anything as he came over to where she was standing. His jacket was gone and there was blood all over his white shirt. That and the dark circles under his eyes made her think that he must not have slept since the last battle.

"I'm glad that you're doing better. We were worried about you last time I saw you."

"I'm doing fine. What about Colonel Mustang? He was supposed to get back days ago…have you heard from him?"

She watched his face slowly change from concerned to sorrowful.

"What is it?" She whispered.

He stared at her for a long moment. In that moment, she already knew.

"No."

"I'm terribly sorry. There was a battle, we were overwhelmed, we fought for hours…"

He went on speaking, but Riza couldn't even hear him.

"No no no no no no no no no." She half heard herself saying before her voice gave way to sobs.

"Please. Calm down, it's all right. He's at peace now."

She cringed, covering her face with her hands. He stopped speaking, understanding that she didn't want to hear more about the details. When she started to slump he called the doctor.

For the next few days she willingly spent her days in the sick bed. In her grief she made herself sick again. When the doctors tried to turn the lights on in her room she would refuse, but even the light coming through the windows during the day were too strong. It seemed to cast an eerie glow on everything in her room. All day she stared around her, too numb to practically feel anything but pain. Weeks went by and they said that the war was over now, thanks to Kimbley and the other state alchemists.

She was healing, and it was inevitable that she would have to get up eventually.

Officers were coming and going all over the base. Camp and equipment was being moved as troops were pulled in and the Amestrisian military got ready to leave Ishval.

The doctors ordered Riza to get out of bed, and although the first few to say so to her almost lost an eye, she eventually knew that she would indeed have to be leaving soon to go home.

So she made an effort to get out of bed once in a while and walk around. But it hurt to do so. It hurt her so bad and not in her body. She just couldn't imagine leaving Ishval now, because it was where Roy had been killed. To leave Ishval was to say goodbye to Roy forever.

She stood by herself now, looking out the window at the black expanse of night. She heard the door to her room open. "I don't want my medicine now." She said, not turning around.

"Good. I don't have any for you, I'm afraid."

She turned around and saw Kimbley standing in the doorway.

"Oh. I'm sorry major Kimbley. I thought that you were my doctor."

She turned back to the window after she had spoken. She would be polite to him but she didn't have to like him.

That bastard had fought at the battle with Roy and lived. How was that fair? How could the universe have spared Kimbley and not Roy? And she could never forgive him for being the one to tell her of Roy's death. Mainly because she was sure that he had looked forward to being the bearer of bad news…

"Do you have a minute, Miss Hawkeye? I understand if you don't feel like talking right now. You're still recovering and you've been under a lot of stress…"

"I'm fine, sir." She said, ignoring the look he gave her. What right had he to look concerned? "Whatever you need to say, you may go ahead."

He stepped closer to her, a little too close for her taste.

"I have something that I want to give you. I wanted to give it to you weeks ago but I was worried that it might upset you too much."

She braced herself for whatever was ahead. When it came to Kimbley, she wouldn't be surprised if he was about to put a knife in her stomach. With that thought in her head, she tensed as she saw him reach into his coat.

He opened his hand in front of her slowly.

In his tattooed palm sat Roy's pocket watch.

Riza's hand shot up to cover her mouth, almost but not quite stifling the sound she made that was halfway between a sob and a gasp.

She didn't seem to notice the way Kimbley watched her face, his eyes all but devouring her as he reached for her hand and put Roy's watch in her own.

"He wanted you to have it."

There was silence for a moment as Riza stared at it. "How do you know?" She finally whispered. "How do you know he would have wanted me to have it?"

"He told me. I held him as he died, and he gave it to me, and said your name."

She looked up at him, suddenly suspicious. "How? He was swarmed…they said…"

"Yes." He said, looking so somber it touched her heart. "But I had to try to save him. He was my brother in arms, how could I not? I fought my way through them all, trying to go back for him. He was already too far wounded when I found him, but I was able to hold him as he died…"

Riza tried to speak but she couldn't. She just couldn't.

Roy

 _Roy_

Kimbley waited, hoping she would open the watch up, wondering if he should suggest she do so, but after a while, she did just that.

Inside the watch was a blood red flower.

"He picked it for you, before the last battle." Kimbley said.

Riza was sobbing in earnest now. So far deep in her grief that she let Kimbley do the unthinkable: She let him pull her into his arms and cry into his chest.

He stroked he head gently, letting her continue, although he did not say anything.

It seemed like forever when Riza finally pulled back to look up at him, her eyes shimmering with tears. "Why?" She said, "Why would you do this for him? For me?"

He didn't tell her that she didn't know everything about him, like she had thought he might. He didn't say that he was actually a good person, or that he wasn't the monster that everyone seemed to think that he was. He didn't say anything at all, he just stared at her with those blue eyes that she had thought were so cold, once upon a time. And his silence spoke louder than his words ever could have.

She shook her head to herself. "All this time…" She started, and had to clear her throat before she went on, "All this time I thought that you were selfish, a bad man, a monster-someone to be avoided at all costs."

"I was wrong, wasn't I?"

Kimbley could taste her tears on her lips when he went in to kiss her. He wanted to kiss her harder, passionately, but he held back. There was time for that later. He kissed her slowly, gently, waiting for her to kiss him back, which she, in her grief, finally did.

In her heartbreak, in her need for comfort, she didn't break the kiss.

And she didn't pull away when he led her over to her bed.

Kimbley smiled to himself as he pulled her tighter against him.

Somehow, things always had a way of working out just right.

….

 _Kimbley sighed, a deep sound of relief. He had scarcely hoped that things would go this well._

 _He reached down to carefully tuck the flower and Roy Mustang's pocket watch in his jacket pocket._

 _The sun was just rising, and the sky was bright pink and yellow._

 _"_ _What a beautiful day." He said to himself._

 _He cracked his knuckles together. It was time to get this show on the road. And he still had more work in Ishval to do._

 _He stretched his arms out to his sides._

 **The End**


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